What To Expect When You're Expecting review

The hype…
A host of recognisable faces from Cameron Diaz to Dennis Quaid feature in this comedic adaptation of a self help book. On top of concerns over how self-help literature translates to comedy, we're nervous that such a vast ensemble cast could lead to another 'New Years Eve' style mess.

The story…
Across America, a group of adults of various ages and walks of life are united by one theme in their lives: they're about to have a baby.

TV fitness instructor Jules (Cameron Diaz) and her reality TV dance partner/lover Evan (Matthew Morrison) are locked in a power struggle ahead of their new arrival, baby store owner and author Wendy (Elizabeth Banks) is finding pregnancy far from the glowing joy she'd hoped for, while her husband Gary (Ben Falcone) has issues with his own dad to resolve before he becomes one.

Elsewhere, young food van owners Rosie (Anna Kendrick) and Marco (Chace Crawford) have a 'surprise' ending to their first date, and photographer Holly (Jennifer Lopez) is set to adopt an Ethiopian child - just as her job security plummets to a new low. While she freaks out, her husband (Rodrigo Santoro) seeks advice from a close-knit gang of park walking Dads (including Chris Rock).

The breakdown…
There's so much wrong with this film that it's hard to know where to start. Our fears were fully realised and then some.

Like 'Valentine's Day' and 'New Year's Eve' before it, 'What To Expect When You're Expecting' suffers from too many characters and too few engaging stories.

There's so much to be drawn out from the life-changing experiences of pregnancy and parenthood, but rather than explore them in a meaningful way, this film leaps between clichéd comedy and drama setups.

Even when genuinely recognisable problems are brought up, they're resolved so easily that it's hard to believe that the script's source material comes from a self help book. There's little that's helpful in here.

The likeable cast members do some solid work to bring a few laughs to the table, few actresses can reach the comic mania of Elizabeth Banks and nobody matches the winning smile of Cameron Diaz, but any positive vibes are quickly killed off by the attempts at being serious, and dealing with real life issues. We're expected to laugh at idiosyncratic dads one minute, and shed a tear over a miscarriage the next.

Aside from being ill-judged and insensitive, it's emotionally jarring. Comedy and drama can occasionally sit side by side, lord knows there's plenty of observational comedy to take from the stresses of parenthood, but slapstick and tragedy are just too far towards opposite ends of the cinematic spectrum to work together at all.

Ultimately the problem doesn't lie just in the tonal ineptitude though, (any foibles can be forgiven in a well-observed story we can all connect with). It's in the shallow and fake ciphers that pass as characters in this vacuous nonsense. The kids wear short skirts and shirk responsibilities, the celebs are egotistic and uncompromising, and quirky parents frightened of 'real life'. When a story reduces life to such lazy archetypes, it's hard to take it seriously.

The verdict…
Expect to be bored and frustrated with this shallow and uneven ensemble nonsense.

Rating: 2/5

'What To Expect When You're Expecting' is due to be released in the UK on 25 May 2012. Certificate: 12A.