The Empire responds to the White House’s refusal to build a Death Star

The White House Death Star controversy continues apace, now with a withering response coming from 'the Empire', aimed at the Obama administration's refusal to build a Death Star.

An official comment from the US government's science and space administration advisor Paul Shawcross came after 34,000 people signed a petition to demand that a Death Star be built by 2016.

[Related story: White House responds to Death Star petition]

Now there's a rebuttal, addressed from 'Imperial Center, Coruscant'.

It reads: “The overwhelming military superiority of the Galactic Empire has been confirmed once again by the recent announcement by the President of the United States that his nation would not attempt to build a Death Star, despite the bellicose demands of the people of his tiny, aggressive planet.

“'It is doubtless that such a technological terror in the hands of so primitive a world would be used to upset the peace and sanctity of the citizens of the Galactic Empire,' said Governor Wilhuff Tarkin of the Outer Rim Territories. 'Such destructive power can only be wielded to protect and defend by so enlightened a leader as Emperor Palpatine.'

“Representatives on behalf of the nation-state leader from the unimaginatively named planet refused to acknowledge the obvious cowardice of their choice, preferring instead to attribute the decision to fiscal responsibility.

“'The costs of construction they cited were ridiculously overestimated, though I suppose we must keep in mind that this miniscule planet does not have our massive means of production,' added Admiral Conan Motti of the Imperial Starfleet.”

It would appear that someone has a little too much time on their hands...

The Obama administration turned down the request, citing its cost of $850 'quadrillion' as being likely to increase the deficit.