If you’re one of those crusty old types who likes your golf clubs to be hickory and your golf rivals to be salty, you might want to skip this particular article. But if you like things that are fun, well, there’s a grand new tradition unfurling at the British Open: the Frat House.
This year, as they’ve done two times in the past, Zach Johnson, Jordan Spieth, Jason Dufner, Kevin Kisner, Jimmy Walker, Justin Thomas and Rickie Fowler are all crashing together, this year in two adjacent houses. And oh, we have questions. So many questions:
Are they sleeping in bunk beds? Who gets the couch? Who’s handling the food there? Does someone just grab a Scottish pizza on the way home from the course? Who’s the guy who brings cheap beer and drinks the better ones already in the fridge? Who goes to bed early and tells the others to “just keep it down to a dull roar, guys”? Who’s the DJ? Who controls the remote? Do they watch Golf Channel all night, or do they try to find a rerun of “Step Brothers”? Do the dudes who miss the cut slink out of town with a “seeya at Bellerive” note, or do they just hang out and chill for the weekend? Do the guys with no majors have to do the dishes?
Fowler dished a bit on the house(s) after his round, and revealed that this year’s house is actually two small ones next door to each other. All questions above still apply, however. He also notes that Spieth is the messy one, while Walker and Dufner are (surprisingly) neat:
According to Kisner, the after-round entertainment includes a bit of soccer, and you’ll never guess who gets the worst of it:
We do know the answer to one question: winner buys the private jet back home. (You know, just like your own friendly golf game.) “Two years ago we [had], I don’t know if you call it bet, but agreement that, if you win, you get the jet,” Johnson said, noting that “I didn’t pay last year. Somebody else did.” (Spieth won last year. Also, deft move by ZJ to dodge the “bet” word there.)
So who stands to buy the private jet home, and who’s going to be shipping out early? Let’s run down each of the house members:
Zach Johnson (-6)
One of the elder statesmen. He’s the co-leader of the tournament heading into the weekend, so he’s got to be feeling fine. He’s probably the one that goes to bed at a sensible hour.
Kevin Kisner (-6)
Another co-leader, but a double-bogey on 18 is going to sting. Bet nobody teases him about that at all.
Rickie Fowler (-3)
Yet again he’s getting in position to win a major. If he doesn’t come through this time around, that last round of dish-washing Sunday night is going to sting even more.
Jordan Spieth (-3)
You just know Spieth’s the alpha of this crew. And making a charge on Friday to get in contention for the win will only reinforce his in-house dominance. He’s going to get the good easy chair.
Jason Dufner (+3)
Sliding in right on the cut line, which means he plays the weekend but also means two more days of getting hit in the face with soccer balls.
Justin Thomas (+4)
Was sitting pretty at -2, three strokes off Kisner’s lead, when he ejected with three straight double bogeys. Most likely to void the gang’s security deposit by trashing something in the house in frustration.
Jimmy Walker (+8)
Rough day on Friday means he’ll miss the cut. But he’s got two kids waiting for him back at home, so he might just stick around till, oh, August.
More from Yahoo Sports:
• This has to be the worst blown call in baseball history
• Tiger Woods nearly annihilates British Open spectators
• NFL won’t enforce anthem policy as NFLPA works with league on solution
• Mannix: It’s now up to Melo to decide how the rest of his career plays out