Flustered mom demands to be held to the same standards as dads: ‘I want their rubric’

·3-min read
Credit: @domesticblisters/TikTok
Credit: @domesticblisters/TikTok

One TikTok mom is standing up for the mental health of moms everywhere by demanding to be judged by the same standards dads are. 

KC Davis (known on TikTok as @domesticblisters) is a mom, author, and founder of StruggleCare.com — and recently, she’s gone viral for her all-too-real rant about how we judge moms.

The video starts with the pinned comment (presumably in response to one of KC’s previous videos), “Haven’t done anything of what I wanted to achieve today. He’s a great father but not a thoughtful partner sometimes.”

KC, with a jerk of frustration, explodes in response, “This is so fascinating to me. I hear this all the time. ‘He’s a good dad, BUT he’s bad at care tasks.'” 

She continues, “‘He sends the kids to school with the shoes on the wrong feet, hair unbrushed, clothes inside-out, with a popsicle for lunch — but he’s a GREAT dad.'”

“If I sent my kids with their hair unbrushed, shoes on the wrong feet, clothes inside-out, with a popsicle for lunch to school, I’m a ‘bad’ mom,” she goes on to say.

She continues by saying, “I don’t think this is a problem with how we categorize dads. I think it’s a problem with how we categorize moms! If you took away ALL skills related to care tasks, could you even give a definition of what makes a good mom? Because apparently, that definition exists for dads.”

The video concludes by KC saying, “I want to be scored with the dads. I want their rubric.”

‘Wow, this one hit different…’

At over 2k comments, it’s clear KC’s video is a definite conversation-starter. 

“YES! Dads who give their kids love and attention are good dads (of COURSE THEY ARE) without care tasks. Moms MUST do care tasks, not just love,” one user commented.

But not all of the comments seemed to align with KC’s video. Many users interpreted the video as a critique of dads not doing enough, but KC clarified that this was not her point. 

When one user commented, “The bar is so low,” KC replied, “I don’t think that’s always true. Like often you describe someone as a great dad bc they are patient, present, emotionally responsive, and fun.” 

Another user commented, “As a dad I just want to point out she’s not saying dads are doing it wrong. Everybody’s just judging mums wrong.” 

To this, KC responded, “Yes this is what I’m saying. Obviously there are systemic issues with division of labor and gender but that’s another convo.”

But, at over 85k likes, one thing is for certain: KC’s core message is resonating with parents everywhere, and moms are demanding change.

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